June 22, 2015

OK, let’s start here: the article that you may be about to read is a bit explicit. If you are an astute reader, you have already gathered this by reading the freaking title.

I’m really, really not kidding.

In this article, I acknowledge the existence of your pelvic floor muscles, I discuss Kegel exercises, I use many different words to describe the male anatomy, I talk about why I think pornography can destroy your brain, and I even discuss the sexual relationship between me and my wife.

If these topics make you uncomfortable or make you upset or make you turn red in the face, or if you are reading this article at a public place such as your office, I would recommend you either stop reading now or you wait until you are in a more private place.

At the same time, we’re mostly all adults here, and considering the popularity of my “How To Get Fit For Sex” podcast episode, and just about every other article and podcast I’ve done on drive, sex, etc., I’m not going to shy away from a topic like the one I discuss below.

Here is a very, very brief synopsis: I experimented for 30 days with a magnet resistance device for the male anatomy called the “Private Gym” (the same device my dog Blitzen is suspiciously sniffing in the photo above), and I give you the full, nitty-gritty details below.

You’ll laugh. You’ll cry. You’ll blush.

Enjoy.

P.S. Yes ladies, there’s plenty of good advice for you in here too.

P.S.S. Full disclaimer: I got my Private Gym for free. They gave me a trial version. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it was not a refurbished model.

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Day 1, Part 1:

OK, I’ll embarrassingly admit that prior to unboxing my Private Gym, I hadn’t realized that the thing is literally a gym. For your privates. Duh.

Up until this point, as I held the Private Gym box in my hands and walked up the driveway from my mailbox, I was envisioning some kind of highly portable, fold-out, mildly clandestine contraption designed for a quick, cutting-edge full-body workout. You know. My own private gym. Chest, abs, biceps, calves, quads, hammies…the works.

Ahh…such a cute and innocent expectation, Ben.

Instead, as I stand in my kitchen holding a resistance ring and weighted magnet in my hands, I realize that the Private Gym is indeed, as advertised, “a patented, FDA registered weighted penis ring and magnetic weight to maximize pelvic muscle growth and strength”.

Woo, boy. So much for 7-minute abs. I now have the promise of 7-minute gonads.

Well…

…I’m a reasonable guy. I test out a lot of fitness devices for their efficacy, ease-of-use, and efficiency, so I might as well treat this the same way. Yet another muscle training device. A very, very potentially awkward muscle training device.

What the heck, I figure I'll give it a shot.

The instructions are as follows:

“The resistance ring is easy to use and ergonomically designed for men of all sizes. To start, simply place the adjustable ring around your erect penis and follow the guided Private Gym Program exercises. The weight is lifted up and down by squeezing and releasing your pelvic muscles. This movement places resistance on your pelvic muscles, resulting in full muscle growth and strength.”

OK, this seems straightforward enough. Considering myself a pretty intuitive guy, I toss aside the accompanying DVD. I never watch DVD instructions anyways, and this is no exception. After all, it can’t be rocket science (pun.) to wrap something around your dick and then contract, right?

The Private Gym instructions also strictly warn that “the resistance ring should only be used after completing the first four weeks of basic training, which is included with this program”. That means I’m not supposed to use the resistance ring for the first four weeks. I also ignore these instructions.

See, ever since I interviewed my friend Jordan Gray on the podcast “How To Get Fit For Sex”, I’ve included things like kegel exercises when I’m sitting in a car or airplane, front planks and side planks with a focus on deep abdominal contractions, and even the occasional “wet towel” lift workout (listen to the podcast episode to hear what I mean, or just use your imagination).

Plus, the thing weighs only 2.5 ounces. According to the Private Gym website: “Placed on the erect penis and lifted up and down, the super-soft, “resistance ring” weighs only 2.5 oz, not a lot but enough weight to dramatically strengthen and grow the pelvic muscles.”

So yeah, I can crawl under freaking barbwire in a front plank position for 10 minutes. I can swim for hours at a breakneck pace. I can flip really heavy tires. So I figure I can strip off the training wheels and jump straight into using this resistance ring with the special weighted magnet thingy.

Based on that, the following is to be my workout for the first week:

Easy enough. Compared to burpees and squats, this should be a cinch. Not only that, but maybe if I do this three times per week as directed, I can achieve all the testosterone boosting benefits of sexual stimulation in the absence orgasm (another thing Jordan talked about in our episode).

OK, let’s do this. Day 1, Step 1…deep breath…and…get an erection! Go!

Fail.

Now here’s the deal fellas. I’m not a “porn guy”. Moral oppositions aside, I’m convinced that frequent exposure to erotic imagery of an unlimited number of ready-to-mate females is a fast track to short-circuit your dopamine production. You can read all more about how you can totally screw yourself (heh.) biologically with porn by visiting YourBrainOnPorn.com. So I’m not going to use porn for my Private Gym training.

And my attempt to close my eyes and use sheer will to force myself into a giant erection? Well, any hot-blooded male knows how well that works.

So I go to my secret weapon: erotic, sexy, mouth-drooling photos of…my wife. Yeah, she doesn’t read my articles, or else she’d probably be red in the face right now. If you do read this, then sorry babe. It’s for the sake of science. I won’t publish the photos.

OK, photos ready. Boom. Erection complete. Resistance band with weight attached. Ready for lift-off.

Woo-hoo! Contract, release…contract, release. Yeah, cowboy.

Damn.

My erection is quickly fading.

It’s actually much, much harder than I thought to focus on reading workout instructions, contracting and relaxing my pelvic floor, attempting to ignore the fact that there’s a miniature weighted vest on my penis, maintaining an erection, and staring at photos that are supposed to maintain my erection all at the same time. And as you can imagine, the resistance band doesn’t really jive well with flaccidity. It’s like trying to keep a straw on a wet noodle.

So I need another plan.

Sure, I’ll ask “the experts” during my introductory educational call with the good folks at Private Gym next week, but time is not to be wasted. So I hatch a plan…

…let’s just say I could rope my wife into helping me for 10 minutes, three times a week, to “maintain” an erection during my Private Gym training . I’m literally thinking something like: foreplay, then stop to do the exercises, start again, stop again, and so on. Kind of like tantric sex combined with Rocky Balboa-style grunting and lifting. What woman could resist such a proposal? I can’t guarantee a “no orgasm” approach with this technique, as I’m not sure I have that amount of willpower, but there's my idea. Don’t laugh.

So tonight, I shall propose to my wife over a glass of wine, and a tiny weighted band. Romantic.

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Day 1, Part 2:

She said yes.

And things progressed pretty quick from there, really.

We finish our wine.

We get kids to bed, fast. Done. Night kids, here’s your earplugs.

Run to bedroom, with about the same amount of excitedly teenager-like anticipation as the last time we tried something new (*cough* handcuffs and whipped cream *cough*).

Music, check. Disrobe, check. And from there, you can pretty much use your imagination.

Actually, don’t. I don’t want you imagining me and my wife doing a Private Gym workout together. That’s not comfortable for me.

Instead, I’ll give you the basics.

First we get all hot and heavy, then stop to put on resistance band. Next I start round one of my training: contract, relax, contract, relax, five rounds done. 20 rapid flexes, done. 20 second hold, done. My penis quivers (oh geez, did I just write that?) under the weight towards the end, but it's totally doable. We make out while I’m doing the workout round. Then back to more hot and heavy foreplay during my one minute rest.

We repeat for another round. And then one final round. This is kinda fun actually. In a “I’m working out while we have sex” kind of fun way.

Then, after my three rounds of Private Gym training are complete, we finish love-making in our traditional way, with the giant clown-suits, leather balls, and dwarf goats. Heh, kidding. We finish with an orgasm. The no-orgasm approach isn’t something I’m quite sold on yet.

So anyways, that’s the end of Day 1 of my Private Gym training. I collapse into deep sleep, the first of the next 30 days of my manly exercise complete.

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Day 2:

I wake up.

Penis mildly sore? I can’t tell. Maybe just placebo. Pelvic floor feels good. Maybe a little fatigued, but not like I’m uncontrollably incontinent and peeing my underwear or anything like that.

The resistance ring is still sitting on the nightstand. It's supposedly “body safe, hypoallergenic, DEHP-free, completely waterproof and compatible with all body safe lubricants”. Whatever. I clean the heck out of the thing with soapy water. Twice.

Of course, I have no Private Gym training today. I don’t want to get overtraining and adrenal fatigue, you know. I’ll stick to three training sessions per week. My wife is on board. Fist-pump for that. Pun.

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Day 3:

I was supposed to do Private Gym training tonight. My wife knew about it because I “warned” her. But instead, I fell asleep. Long day.

However, on a more helpful note, I did get a chance to talk to one of the head honchos at Private Gym, a guy named David. So I asked David my one burning question: how does one maintain an erection in between the “rest periods” during the training?

In a nutshell, “self-stimulate” is the politically correct answer that he gave me. Makes sense, and it’s kinda what I figured. Interestingly, David also brought up the topic that if you have a hard time getting an erection in the first place (heh), then you can “work backwards” into the Private Gym training by using something like Cialis or Viagra to get an erection, then do your training with a little help from pill chemistry – with the end goal (of course) of not needing the erectile dysfunction pill once you’ve finished your month of training.

Interesting idea. But I’ll personally stick to beet juice.

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Day 4:

Got another training session in tonight, and I must admit that it’s mildly awkward to stop in the middle of sex to do my special workout, and then keep going. At least I think so. My wife, on the other hand, seems incredibly excited about the whole thing and the tantric anticipation of starting, then stopping, then starting, then getting close to climax, then stopping again.

So if anything, this whole Private Gym thing is at least: A) enhancing my love life; and B) tricking me into tantric sex. Sneaky.

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Day 5:

I’ve realized that there could be a slight hiccup in my Private Gym training: today I’m headed off to a 5 day wilderness survival course. We’re talking grunting men gathered around a campfire chewing on charcoal-encrusted chunks of elk meat. I can't exactly sneak my wife into camp, and there’s no way I’m going to get a boner in a tent in the middle of the wilderness, especially considering I’m sharing said tent with a bunch of other dudes.

So for the next 5 days, I’m shifting to my backup plan, a plan endorsed by the folks at Private Gym as an option for when you want to do your training without an erection and without the weighted magnet attached to your little guy. It’s really just a fancy, structured version of Kegel exercises (again, without the weighted penis magnet), and here’s how it goes:

-Squeeze pelvic muscles as hard as I can and hold the contraction for 3-5 seconds

-Release slowly and relax for 1-2 seconds

-Perform 50 repetitions

-Next, perform 20 “Rapid Flexes”

-At the end of each set, hold the contraction for 20 seconds.

-Rest 1 minute.

-Perform 3 sets.

Rapid Flex? OK, I realize some of the terminology may be confusing, so here’s a snapshot of a page in the Private Gym instruction manual:

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Day 6:

Wilderness penis training complete.

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Day 7:

Off day.

I’m wondering if they make tiny foam rollers I can use to enhance recovery of my pelvic muscles. I’m also curious if a post-workout protein shake could enhance results. Blood doping perhaps? There’s got to be all sorts of ways you can biohack your Private Gym training. Maybe even one of those elevation training masks to make breathing more difficult.

Just wondering.

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Day 8:

As I lay in my sleeping bag before drifting off to sleep, I do another set of Private Gym exercises. I’m sure that with my dedication to these Kegel-style moves, I would be a great pregnant mother. After all, physicians frequently prescribe these things to women for childbirth preparation.

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Day 9:

Last day in the wilderness, and another recovery day.

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Day 10:

Back home to my lovely wife. After a glass of wine, I jump right back into my weighted training.

And here’s the deal: both orgasm and ejaculation are significantly stronger and better today. It could be the fact that I’ve spent the past 5 days getting blue-balled in the wilderness while hanging out with seven other guys in a macho sausage-fest completely devoid of sex opportunities, or it could be that this whole Private Gym thing is actually working.

Either way, I’m not complaining.

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Day 11:

Well, it has happened: yet another disruption in my Private Gym training. In retrospect, I probably should have planned out a period of my life containing one unbroken period of 30 days to truly devote to making my penis stronger.

Instead, I hopped on a plane today to fly to a 4 day speaking gig, once again wifeless, but still just as devoted as ever to completing some semblance of Private Gym training.

So I decided to join the mile-high Kegel exercise club during a Spokane to Phoenix flight by completing my entire training session quietly in my airplane seat, squeezing and releasing, squeezing and releasing over and over again, as the lady sitting next to me sat blissfully unaware that her seat mate was engaged in a hard and heavy reproductive muscle training session. Aside from a very small bead of sweat that formed on my brow, I managed to covertly finish up my training at 30,000 feet elevation (sans erection and sans magnet, of course).

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Day 12:

I’ve had a breakthrough. Today I combined my Private Gym training with grip training. No, no, no…it’s not what you think. I’m not going to go blind or get hairy palms.

Instead, here’s what I did: I own a bad-ass, super difficult 150 pound steel grip trainer called “Captains Of Crush”. And what I’ve discovered is that if I combine each pelvic muscle contraction with a hard and heavy squeeze on my grip trainer, and I can not only squeeze my pelvic muscles even harder, but I can also train my fingers, hands and forearms at the same time I train my penis (yeah, yeah, that was an awkward sentence to write).

As a self-proclaimed biohacker obsessed with efficiency and getting the most out of every workout I do, this is an appealing concept: now I can train two body parts simultaneously. Sure, this method probably won’t work during my Private Gym training with my wife, but for my solo, erection-less and magnet-less efforts, this is pretty dang cool.

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Day 13:

I am breaking the rules and perhaps overtraining my genitalia, but since I’m still at this conference, I did another session of grip training combined with Kegels today. I will keep very close note if anything turns blue and falls off, or if I come down with some strange case of penile rhabdomyolysis…

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Day 14:

Long flight home today.

After two hardcore days of training, I’m taking the day off of Private Gym, even though I’ll still admit that I have yet to experience any pelvic floor muscle soreness. Rather, it’s as if I have a greater sense of awareness of everything “down there” because I’ve been contracting it so much. It feels as though I’m building some kind of mind-muscle connection or an enhanced neuronal network connection into my crotch.

I’m pretty sure this is a good thing.

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Day 15:

Hooray. After being away from my wife for most of the week, I get to have sex tonight, with *real* Private Gym training, erection and all.

Mayday, mayday…there seems to be a problem. I’m having a hard time getting it up. Seriously. This hasn’t happened since the days of Ironman triathlon training when I used to spend 3-4 hours in a bike saddle. But for some odd reason, I’m a little…flaccid. My wife is pretty good-natured about the whole thing, and even though I eventually get it up enough to have a little fun, my poor little guy can barely support the Private Gym magnet weight.

What’s going on? Have I overtrained my pelvic floor? Did I ruin something?

This is exactly the opposite of what’s supposed to happen with this new training regimen. I’m supposed to be getting stronger, not weaker. Not that I expect to turn into some kind of sex god, but at the same time, I’m going to throw the towel in on this whole Kegel thing if the final result is erectile dysfunction.

I fall asleep, a little disappointed.

——————–

Day 16:

I’m taking the day off of training. I’m a bit nervous. Perhaps my muscles just need some recovery after last night’s disappointing performance. Maybe it was just a fluke, and totally unrelated to the Private Gym training. Maybe it was just all the airline travel. Who knows. Either way, I don’t feel like training.

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Day 17:

I’m back, jack.

I made it halfway through the day today, and just couldn’t take it any longer. I had to find out if day 15 was a fluke.

And herein lies the advantage of having a home office. Day 17 was a definite highlight of the entire Private Gym experience. Most of you gentleman have probably used this strategy at some point in your life, and if you haven’t, I highly recommend it: I hunted down my wife while she was taking a shower, and used the sneak, surprise strategy. An average, hot-blooded American woman just can’t seem to turn down a naked, wet, soapy, lathered-up dude, and I took full advantage of the fact. Absolutely no cold shower was involved for me on this one .

I was fast. I was furious. I was definitely not flaccid. And while I didn’t take my magnet in the shower for an actual training session, I didn’t really care. My crotch most definitely got a workout.

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Day 18:

So yet another new development has occurred and yet another valuable Private Gym learning experience could be right around the corner. I’m hopping on a plane to head across the country to speak, but this time, I’m bringing the whole family with me, wife and all.

Yep, that means I’m packing a penis magnet.

What will TSA think? Will it trigger an explosive alarm as pass through security? Will I be branded as a national security threat due to the mysterious object in my carry-on bag. I mean, I obviously won’t be *wearing* the thing, but at the same time, I can’t imagine that genital exercise devices go through the security scanner all too often.

I’m happy to report that no alarms sounded. My Private Gym workout equipment made it safe and sound on the plane. Now, let’s just hope we don’t have a noisy, squeaky bed at our lodging.

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Day 19:

Nothing notable to report. I made it safely across the country and settled into a rented home with the family, and no chance yet for a Private Gym training session, but I am of course, every day, continuing with the hand gripper + Kegel exercise routine

…getting strong like bull…

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Day 20:

Here’s an interesting observation: I noticed that the PrivateGym website discusses the concept of how your pelvic muscles power “everything below the belt”.

So technically, all this pelvic floor training should:

1. Make me a better pooper.

2. Make me a better runner.

3. Make me a better lover.

So based on this, I believe that “Poop, Run, Love.” would be a great tagline for a Private Gym promotional campaign. But seriously, I actually have noticed what seems to be better “control” of my bathroom muscles when I’m squatting on the toilet. Since I never before peed myself while running, I can’t say that has improved, but I would imagine for someone who has any type of running incontinence, this could come in handy.

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Day 21:

This was the one day of our vacation on which I actually was able to attach the magnet to myself and get in training during an actual lovemaking session. I’m very, very proud of myself for transporting a weighted penis trainer across the entire country, and then actually using it. Hooray for me.

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Day 22:

Now that I’ve trained for 3 weeks with the Private Gym, I’m finding myself subconsciously doing Kegel exercises and pelvic contractions at completely random occasions, including standing in line at the grocery store, typing e-mails, making a smoothie, and reading books.

You could say that randomly contracting my pelvis has become as natural as breathing.

Whether this is a good habit or a bad habit, I’m not quite sure, but unlike the natural act of breathing, I have become consciously self aware during my pelvic contractions that curious bystanders may be able to see my butt muscles contracting through my shorts or jeans, or worse yet, see my pelvis quietly rocking back and forth, like some kind of Elvis wannabe.

Oh well, you know what? If you have nothing better to do that stare at my twitching crotch, then fine. Do your thing. I’m confident with my Kegels.

——————–

Day 23:

My wife made my day today.

We had sex (which, as a fun byproduct of this whole Private Gym thing, has been a very regularly occurring theme of the month), and as we finished, sweating, breathing hard, and collapsing into each other’s arms, she commented:

“You know, I can actually feel that you’re doing those exercises.”

Really?

“You feel kind of bigger. It’s like your muscles grew down there.”

Cool. I fall asleep smiling. It’s working. I was never too worried about incontinence, prolapse, pelvic floor disorder, or any of those other medical-ly things – I just wanted to get into this Private Gym training to perform better in the bedroom. And so far, the experiment is working fantastically.

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Day 24:

Today I published an article about Kegel exercises at QuickAndDirtyTips.com. If you’re this far into reading and still scratching your head about how the heck Kegel exercises work, why to do them, the research behind them, the myths about them causing pelvic floor disorder, and even the skinny on special barbells, weights, springs, or cones designed to be held in a woman’s anatomy, then read it.

And of course, inspired by my wife’s compliments last night, I Kegel-ed the heck out of myself today.

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Day 25:

I delved into studying something interesting today (that I alluded to a bit earlier when I mentioned that the Private Gym could potentially make you a better pooper): Kegel training can actually help with constipation.

Here’s how: people with a weakened anal sphincter (the muscle around the anus) or people with certain nerve problems in their pelvic floor muscles may not recognize the sensation that their rectum is filling and they need to have a bowel movement. Other people can actually sense that they need to have a bowel movement, but no matter how long a time they spend on the toilet or how hard they push, they just can’t seem to be able to relax their internal sphincters to “let go”. In the latter situation, this is kind of a big deal, since it can cause a rectal prolapse. Google that. It’s not cool.

Biofeedback, also known as neurofeedback, is a training technique in which you squeeze and hold the muscles in the pelvic area as hard as you can (for example, for 30 seconds), then you *completely* relax those muscles while gently breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth (for another 30 seconds). This type of biofeedback helps you to recognize and and control the function of your sphincter.

I was inspired to look into this after realizing that 25 days into Private Gym training, my pooping function seemed to be enhanced. Now I’m not saying that Kegels are the only thing you should be doing if you’re constipated (I have plenty more pooping tips here), but they’re definitely worth it for learning how to train your anal sphincter muscles.

Anyways, kind of a rabbit hole, or more appropriately, a human hole, but it’s still pretty interesting, isn’t it?

——————–

Day 26:

I had another weighted workout tonight, and this time I noticed that the 2.5 ounce weight is definitely getting lighter. I guess this makes sense. After all, I’m turning into a seasoned penis weightlifter. My body is morphing. Perhaps I need to wear an elevation training mask or something to make this more difficult.

However, upon inspecting the Private Gym website, I see that I can actually enhance my workout by ordering additional weights. There’s an add-on package that includes 2 additional magnetic weights that each weigh 2.5 ounces. Turns out I can even choose “orange” or “charcoal gray”. True to my hunches, the website says “you will need these additional weights as you continue to strengthen your pelvic muscles and maximize pelvic muscle growth and strength”.

I didn’t actually order the extra weights. Yet. I think I’ll finish my 30 day trial before I decide if I really want to turn my pelvic floor into the incredible hulk.

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Day 27:

As I get closer and closer to the end of my 30 day experiment, I’ve found myself more frequently on The Private Gym website, especially the FAQ section.

One of the claims they make is that…

“The Private Gym is specifically designed to work in conjunction with erectile dysfunction medications. The Private Gym exercises are designed to help reverse the onset of erectile dysfunction resulting from pelvic muscle weakness, which may ultimately reduce the need for future medication.”

So if I understand correctly, one could enhance results by popping Viagra prior to their training session? I guess since weightlifters take nitric oxide, beta-alanine, niacin and other blood flow enhancers prior to workouts, it does kind of make sense.

Problem is, as I outline in the article Four Natural, Pill-Free Alternatives To Spending $9.52 On A Viagra Pill (And One Potent Drive Tip For Ladies), there are some serious problems with Viagra, including priapism (click here to see what that very unpleasant thing is), severe drop in blood pressure, myocardial infarction (heart attack), abnormal heart rhythms, stroke, and sudden hearing loss – resulting in a complete lack of ability to enjoy that Barry Manilow you have piping through the bedroom. In clinical trials, common adverse effects of Viagra include headache, flushing, heartburn, nasal congestion, loss of peripheral vision, extreme visual blurriness and impaired eyesight, ironically including seeing tinted blue colors (also known as cyanopsia).

Yikes.

But tomorrow night, I plan on trying the following natural alternatives to Viagra (I discuss these and many more in the article I mention above):

-Pre-dinner: Red Wine (the good stuff of course)
-Main dish: Buttered oysters over a bed of ice, with Fresh Watermelon (add sea salt and cayenne pepper to the watermelon)
-Side dish: Roasted Red Peppers with Black Pepper & Garlic
-Dessert: Dark Chocolate

Everything listed above acts very similarly to Viagra, but is of course entirely natural. And of course, I’ll throw in my usual testosterone booster “Aggressive Strength” that I take every day anyways.

I’ll keep you posted on the results.

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Day 28:

OK, another important Private Gym FAQ, and a potentially sensitive questions:

Q. Does the Private Gym Resistance Training Equipment fit all penis sizes?

A. Yes. The Private Gym Resistance equipment is expertly designed to fit all penis sizes. The flexible ultra-soft silicone band opens and closes to gently grip the shaft of the penis.

So there you have it. All sizes welcome.

By the way, I’m sure you’re wondering if my nutrition hack worked tonight.

Despite having to fight away my children so that I could at least harvest a few tiny shreds of leftover watermelon, and despite being forced to share half my dark chocolate with my wife, I consumed more than my fair share of oysters and roasted red peppers.

And yes, throbbing vascularity ensued.

I have been waiting this entire article to write that phrase. I may never get a chance to include that in my writing again, so I’m savoring every moment. Throbbing vascularity. There, I did it again.

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Day 29:

My wife, my neighbors and my housekeeper are all accustomed to me getting very strange packages in the mail, and half the time, they’re the ones opening the packages, not me.

So I’m pretty used to getting raised eyebrows when I receive everything from coffee enema equipment to EMF blocking underwear.

But your life may not as embarrassingly and shameless public as mine, so if you’re concerned about everything from what appears on credit card statements to what shows up on the doorstep of your house, then have no fear, because the Private Gym FAQ boldly states:

Q. Is the Private Gym shipped in discreet packaging?

A. Your privacy is guaranteed. The Private Gym is shipped in discreet packaging and appears as “gym fee” on your credit card statement. More importantly, any personal information provided to The Private Gym is kept confidential and is never shared or sold.

And I will admit, the box actually is pretty discreet. It is not a giant penis shaped, guitar-case size contraption that will arrive on your doorstep. And that part about “gym fee” is pretty sneaky, if you ask me. But I suppose it will generate fewer raised eyebrows from your accountant compared to “penis magnet”.

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Day 30:

Wow. I have arrived at Day 30.

I made it through four grueling weeks of hardcore training (possibly the most appropriate use of hardcore I’ve ever written).

I may celebrate today by Kegel-ing myself into a pile of sweaty exhaustion. Or perhaps I’ll just take the wife out for a bit of wining, dining, and one more Private Gym training session.

But this does actually have me thinking…what’s next?

Do I need to continue this protocol multiple times per week? Do I need to Kegel on every airplane flight and whip out the magnet on every lovemaking session?

So I contacted Andrew, my special concierge helper at Private Gym and the guy who sent me the magnet in the first place, and I asked him:

“So after 4 weeks of time on the resistance program, what's next? Do I go into some kind of maintenance mode? How fast will I “lose it”?”

Here is his reply:

“Use it or lose it. The pelvic floor muscles-like all skeletal muscles-are highly adaptive to the stresses and resistances placed upon them…or not. Once the adaptive process has resulted in increased strength and endurance, maintenance training should be pursued. This requires the same level of intensity, but practiced less frequently, once or twice weekly usually being sufficient. In the absence of continued resistance, there will be a slow, but inevitable loss of strength and tone.”

So what’s my plan?

I’ll continue to do Kegels at least once every couple days, since I can do them anytime, anyplace, and they work well with the whole hand grip training thing. And I think a full-on Private Gym weighted magnet lovemaking session is something I (and my wife) could continue to handle every week or two.

So I’ll keep the special little magnet in it’s designated place in the nightstand drawer, waiting for action.

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Summary:

So there you have it.

I’ve managed to shamelessly reveal the results of one of the more embarrassing self-experiments I’ve conducted, and hopefully you’ve learned a few valuable things in the process.

Ultimately, my personal observation is that the Private Gym works, and it’s not a gimmick.

My erections have gotten better, my orgasms have gotten stronger, I’ve dramatically increased my ability to “control” my pelvic muscles and ejaculation during sex, and apparently, although it was never an issue before, I’ve bulletproofed myself against incontinence and pelvic floor disorder. Perhaps I’ll appreciate that last one when I’m 80 years old and saving money on diapers.

If get a Private Gym and you don’t like it, you can return it at any time within 60 days of purchase for a full refund. You can click here to get one, and yes, that’s an affiliate link. I went through a great deal of heartache and hard work with this experiment so you might as well put a few nickels in my hat if you get one of these bad boys for yourself.

Leave any questions, comments or feedback below, and happy training (heh, phone not included as you can see).